Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Surgery day

I was really nervous for today.  When I first took Fuad to the urologist, I was told that his surgery, since it wasn't an emergency, would  probably not be scheduled until late September.  Two weeks ago, they called to let us know that it had been scheduled...for July 25th.  And that day is today.  He was having a two part surgery involving his, um, little boy parts.

The hospital arranged for a translator to be there and she was really good with him.  He didn't seem to respond to her nearly as well as he did the nurse who spoke Serbian to him last week, but it was still nice to have her there.  I'm not sure that he understood much of what she told him about the procedure, but once again, it was nice that the hospital arranged to have her there.

He was not nervous at all before the surgery. In fact, he buzzed around the pre-op area playing with the toys and making everyone fall in love with him.  I went with him to the OR and they had me hold him while they did the initial anesthesia.  I had tears in my eyes as I put him down and walked out of the room.  Now, I am no stranger to operating rooms.  The difference is that I am usually the one on the table.  The first time that you hand your child over to a surgeon, even with a not terribly complicated surgery, it sucks!

The hour and a half that it took for his procedures went rather quickly.  I am happy that I brought my crochet with makes time FLY!  When I finally got to go back, the translator went with me.  She was more  upset that I was.  I am one of those people that can stay pretty calm during a's after that I get upset.  (like being fine while holding Fuad as he went to sleep but being teary after)  Our translator, however, was so upset, and he wasn't even awake yet.  As he started waking up, he began the saddest whimpering.  A dose of tylenol with codeine and some apple juice later, he seemed ok.  He kept trying to touch the area of the surgery and I was told to keep him from touching it.  That made  him SO ANGRY!  His whimpering turned to full out cries and even a scream or two.  The nurse ended up giving him a couple doses of fentanyl and soon he was quite dopey.  It didn't take long, though, for him to get worked up again about not being allowed to inspect his body.  He continued to get more and more upset.  It was time for him to be discharged and we were just waiting for Honey to get there (he had been at home with Vlado) and he was letting everyone know how displeased he was.  As soon as he climbed in the little red wagon, his cries subsided.  We got outside and even the whimpering stopped.

He didn't seem happy in the car.  He got sick on the way home, but I don't know if it was from the codeine or anesthesia.  But after he got sick, he seemed to be a little better.  Getting home seemed to be just the thing he needed.  I made him a piece of toast and he laid in my lap on the couch nibbling away at his meager dinner.  He got up after he finished and went to the bathroom....and peed.  Now, we were told that he would probably be very afraid of going to the bathroom and we might have to put him in the bath to get him to go.  Well, he proved how tough he is.  Over the next couple hours, he snuggled in my lap looking at a magazine.  Every 10-15 minutes, he would clamber up and pull his shorts down to inspect himself.  It was quite funny actually.  He didn't touch it too much or try to take his dressing off.  He just wanted to see.  Now, he had not had any more pain medication since the fentanyl.  I believe he puked up all the tylenol.  But he was comfortable enough to continually whip down his shorts and whip them back up.  I think some of his crying and stuff at the hospital was because he just wanted to check out what was going on "down there" and wasn't being permitted to even look.

At bedtime, he took his shorts off and put on a pull up like he normally does.  He went to Honey and whispered, "Nite nite, Daddy. I love you."  We have been working on him projecting his voice but whenever we say "louder" he just repeats that word instead of speaking louder.  Tonight, Honey said, "louder" and Fuad said, "NITE NITE DADDY. I LOVE YOU!"  Our little boy has amazed us tonight.  I'm so thankful that God took care of our little boy.

Monday, July 9, 2012

Enormous update....about time, right?

I missed posting that Fuad has been with us for 2 months.  Day after tomorrow is the day that he's been in America for 2 months.  The change in this child is unbelievable.  Do you remember when we were visiting him those first few days and we were very nervous because we couldn't get him to look at us?  Now, he will not only make eye contact (of his own accord) he will continue that eye contact for an extended period!  *I should add that his eye contact is pretty much reserved for us.  Others that he sees only occasionally are not worthy it seems. :)  He is currently trying out that eye contact accompanied by a shy smile.....usually when he is being fussed at for something.  He understands so much more English that Vlado did at this point.  I talk to him in full sentences and he does what is asked...well, most of the time. LOL!  He is 7 after all.  He still jabbers away in Serbian A LOT!  But, when my friends (who know Serbian) talk to him, he just repeats what they say instead of conversing.  He did this in Serbia too though.  As far as using English, he is still pretty much in the identifying stage.  He can identify so many things though!  Some of his words are truck, bus, tractor, airplane, boat (do you sense a theme here?), water, juice, eat, drink, (he also uses a sort of sign for eat and drink), more, please, all done(again he uses signs for those), dog, cat, Mama, Daddy, let's go, shower, and careful.  He also knows how to say and can point to eyes, ears, hair, mouth, teeth, knee, leg, finger, and arm.  I'm sure there are more that I just can't remember right now.  Getting him to open his mouth when he speaks is a struggle.  He keeps his mouth shut almost like a ventriloquist!  But the result is a whisper and mumble at the same time and it is pretty frustrating.  I think he has very little confidence and is still a bit shy with us.  I can imagine that he was told to "be quiet" so much before that learning to project his voice is something that will take more time.  If Vlado is an example though, we will end up having to tell him to use "quiet voices" in no time at all. 

He has finally gotten past the bolting his food and drinks.  But he has now become the pokiest eater of any child I have ever seen.  It takes him 45 minutes to eat lunch.  The funny thing is that he takes the smallest bites.  He nibbles the edge of a sandwich like a bunny but then chews that tiny bite like his mouth is full.  We are teaching him "big bites" and he is finally opening his mouth a bit larger to take in more food.  He eats most anything we put on his plate, but I think he's taking cues from Vlado....thankfully!  We are so super blessed that we have two children that will eat what we give them.   We occasionally have small struggles with him not wanting to eat at all, but when he sees Vlado eating desert, he manages to eat something. :)  Funny thing how much of a motivator a fruit cup can be.

The boys both start ESY (extended school year...a fancy term for summer school) tomorrow.  We put Fuad in school pretty soon after we got home.  We know that many would discourage that, but he was so unhappy when Vlado was at school and he was at home.  Getting him to engage when he is not happy is nearly impossible.  He did GREAT at school!  He learned to count to 10 in less than a week...I was impressed!  He is a pretty intelligent's amazing that his paperwork had him listed at moderately mentally retarded.  I don't like that word.....but that was their words.  It's astonishing how much children in orphanages are held back by someone's opinion of what they can and cannot do.

He has such an imagination!  Just now, I saw him playing with two dog bones on the floor.  When I looked at what he was doing, I noticed that he had positioned them to look like a see-saw.  He was moving it in the see-saw motion and making little sounds for up and down.  He came to us not knowing how to hold a pencil.  He still has some work to do, but he has improved so much!  He loves drawing on his magnadoodle and is very precise.  He did an phenomenal drawing of an airplane the other day.  We were amazed at his detail.  I didn't realize that I had not even introduced coloring to Fuad until we were at a restaurant last night.  Vlado doesn't enjoy coloring, so it didn't even dawn on me to let Fuad try.  He held the crayons so well and did a pretty good job of staying in the lines.  He even made a color pattern on a, yellow, green, yellow - on its belly.  

Potty training is going pretty well.  That was the thing that I was least looking forward to.  When he is at home, he is in underwear pretty much all the time.  I still haven't tested underwear in public.  I really should try though because he does a very good job of taking himself to the bathroom and he stays dry almost all the time.  He is learning the other part of potty going pretty well too.  I'm not sure what the school will want to do.  If he is wearing a pullup, he doesn't even try to hold it.  So, I guess we will talk to the teacher and see what she wants to do with him.  I will not be sad to see pullups gone from this house!

When we first got home, Fuad was terrified of the dog!!  If she was in the room, Fuad would not do anything but stare at her with a look of horror.  Here's the bad part....the dog quite often lays down under the kids' table.  She and Vlado have been buddies since the get go so it was only natural for her to be close to him.  So, when Fuad was just another set of feet to rub her belly (in her opinion).  But, in Fuad's mind, she was under the table to eat his toes and he would NOT SIT there if she was so close.  Now, however, they are friends.  We are blessed that our dog is very easy going.  Fuad will lay down on the floor right by Bailey's food bowl to watch her eat.  The other day, the dog was laying on the couch.  I looked over to see Fuad's head right by the dog's and he was twirling her tags on her collar and giggling at the tinkling sound. 

I'm sure there are things that I am forgetting....strides he has made and boundaries he has pushed past.  He is a great kid....I can't believe we have been blessed again with such an easy going child.  I wish more people would take a chance and adopt an older child.  They just need a chance to blossom.  I'm so happy that God gave us the opportunity to help him reach his real potential!  I'm sorry there are no pics.  My camera has been MIA since we got home from Serbia.  :(